Each Mother’s Day we are barraged with worn platitudes about how being a mother is the “best job on Earth”, but if you look at the terms of the mommy gig on paper it’s actually a pretty terrible job. You’re on 24/7 call, the tasks are beyond menial (read: gear schlepping and butt wiping), an iron-clad employment contract has you locked in for 18 years, and your boss lives in your house. Salary? Please. Vacation or sick days? Bwahahahaha! (We’d alert HR but they gave our last request a raspberry and then went back to eating their own feet.) As a mom, you are basically an unpaid volunteer sherpa/maid/line cook/chauffeur that works medical intern’s hours for an unpredictable little tyrant.
But here’s the thing: you’re crazy in love with your boss. Despite her inexhaustible demands and flagrant disregard for employment laws, you keep showing up to the office. Every. Single. Day. One extra-long hug or dear little smile and all of the gross (and we mean GROSS) indignities of your job fall away. It also doesn’t hurt that you’re the undisputed rockstar of your department. When the boss loses her cool, no one knows what she needs quite like you.
While we will continue to wonder why moms haven’t unionized yet (or is that what playgroup is for?), we honor their selfless dedication to the best, worst job on Earth. Happy Mother’s Day, xoxo P&V